So, you’ve finally gotten  rid of the loser you’ve been dating.  And now he’s calling you and saying how he wants you back.  Read on to discover five tactics he may use to get you to take him back

Just to be clear, I’m referring to the guys who have demonstrated repeatedly that they do not value your time or attention and therefore are not worth wasting any more time on.  You guys know who I’m talking about: the one that has stood you up on countless occasions with no apology, the one who degrades you and disrespects you, the one who only calls you at 11:00 pm because…well, you know why.

After a while even the most smitten female will become fed up and decide that she’s had enough of the low-lives invading her life and will decide to move on.

But beware my female friends! These guys won’t give up access to your golden treasure without a fight.

Here are some tactics the guys I should have swiped left on have used to try and keep me around:

5 Tactics


Maybe this guy has done something for you in the past: he helped you move last year, he loaned you $500 bucks when you were in a tight spot 2 months ago, or he fixed your car when it just would not start.  Whatever it is that he did, he now holds that over you like mistletoe at the dreaded office holiday party.

Do not let him guilt you.  Once you’ve taken care of your side of the obligation, you’ve paid back the money he lent you for example, etc., you do not owe him a darn thing more.  Let him go and find someone else to guilt trip.

A “Good” Reason

This guy uses a good reason to stay in your life after you want him gone.   Maybe he’s promised to do something for you, take you somewhere, or get you in contact with some people who would make great clients for your business.  His “help” is not worth the toxicity he brings to your life.

A guy kept using the money he owed me as an excuse to come over and then would conveniently forget to bring it or just not show up when he promised!  I told him to keep it.  Now he has no reason to get in contact with me and my life has a little less drama in it.


This is by far the most frequently used weapon in the loser guy’s arsenal!!

11:31 pm

Loser Guy:  Hey baby, I was thinking about you and wanted to see if you could pass by.  I miss you.

You:  No, I told you I don’t want to see you anymore.  Besides, it’s late and I have to get up early for work tomorrow.

Loser Guy:  Baby, come on.  I’ll give you that sweet stuff that’ll put you right to sleep.  Just come see me baby.

You:  Nah…

Loser Guy:  Don’t you remember how perfect we were together.  I know you miss that.  Can’t nobody satisfy you like me.

You:  (Click)

Yeah going back to that guy might feel good at that moment but what happens after?  Will you still feel good 30 minutes after, 2 hours later, in the morning?  Chances are, you’ll feel used especially when you try to reach out to him and it goes straight to voicemail.

It’s better to make an investment at the adult toy store than to deal with that loser.


Finding a new man won’t necessarily keep the past losers at bay.  They may try to pry you away from your new guy by using ridicule.

Loser:  How can you be with someone like that?  He’s so boring.  You deserve better.  I bet he can’t even satisfy you like I can!

You:  Oh, you mean how can I be with a guy who calls when he says he will, doesn’t stand me up, and who stimulates me intellectually?  Gee, I don’t know…

Make You Feel Like the Bad Guy

This guy may try to get you back in his life by making you feel like the bad guy, so to speak.  After you’ve told him firmly that you no longer want to see him, he still calls you, still tries to make arrangements to meet, and just happens to be in the neighborhood when he lives 45 minutes away.  When you tell him to back off, he pretends to be hurt and says that he just wanted to make sure that you’re alright because after everything, he still considers you to be a friend and he would never treat you like that if the situation was reversed.  After he makes a few more similar speeches to you over the next few days, you start to think that maybe you were too harsh on him, maybe you are being a meanie.

Please listen to me, you are not the bad guy.  You were just wise enough to leave a situation that was doing more harm than good. More power to you, sister girl!  Don’t waste your pity on this guy; there are other people who are far more deserving of it like that coworker of yours who broke a nail, or that guy who found a fly in his soup, or … just about anyone else really.

People who want to use you, will always try to find a way to keep you in their lives so that they can keep taking advantage of you.  The thing is to be aware of it because once you’re aware of their tactics, you can take steps to protect yourself against them.

So ladies, what other tactics have the losers you’ve dealt with used try and keep you hangin’ around?


Author: Melissa

Hi there =)
Supermom in training and trying to prove that single moms can lead happy and fulfilling lives.

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